…and I blame work. It would seem that the words of Sun Tsu ring oh so very true when he declared:
Military tactics are like unto water; for water in its natural course runs away from high places and hastens downwards... Water shapes its course according to the nature of the ground over which it flows; the soldier works out his victory in relation to the foe whom he is facing. Therefore, just as water retains no constant shape, so in warfare there are no constant conditions. He who can modify his tactics in relation to his opponent and thereby succeed in winning, may be called a heaven-born captain. (Sun Tsu)
though this is often simplified to “no plan, no matter how well conceived, ever survives first contact with the enemy.” And that seems to be the story of my life at the moment. I seem to spend most of my time adjusting my plans to accommodate changes in my situation.
So, my plans are in constant flux as I try to figure things out and make myself move forward. I’m bored with the stagnation that seems to surround my transition, and I’m sick of my own indecision. So, I am going to push myself on the path.
For now, my plan is to work on getting permanent hair removal (I need sources for electrolysis still, but I think I have somewhere to start working on the laser to go in tandem with electrolysis). Second step is to start spending time outside of work as a girl. That is the part that really scares me, honestly. I do not feel that I can pass as a girl at the moment, considering that I have limited practice. The only way to get the practice, however, is to practice. So, thus, practice I must do.
My ultimate goal is to be living fully part time as a girl (meaning, everywhere outside of work) by May of next year, and to be living full time as a girl (in and outside of work) by October of 2012. Now, we’ll see if I can make the plan to fit the strategy.
In other news, I finally quit smoking entirely. It’s been a bumpy ride, but so far so good. I still have thoughts and desires for cigarettes, but I’m not acting on them. I’m doing much better than a week ago, and it’s getting easier. I think I may have finally kicked it for good. This pleases me greatly.
Well, that’s about the update. Now I can go another two months without writing in this blog (though, I will try to write more often than that).
